1. Children love to explore. They want to touch everything and have no discretion. For young children, simple word phrase work best. "Yes touch" is what you might use for safe things and "no touch" for things that are off limits. Something can be touched, but they must be gentle, so "gentle touch" could be used for thing like babies or kittens. When children just can't help, but grab, maybe teach them to just use one finger. Although it is something we don't want our child to discover, "hot touch" will be another phrase that will be good to teach them.
2. When you discover your child is holding something that you do not want them to have, it is in our nature to snatch it out of their hands. Without realizing it, you have just taught them that if they want something, then the proper way to get it is to take it. The best way to handle the situation is to ask for the object or ask them if you may help them with it. You will most likely avoid a tantrum and you are showing them an example of how to be polite and respect others. Your child needs you to talk to them and model the behavior you expect.
3. When your child has pulled everything out of the cupboard for the 10th time today and you think you just can't take cleaning up one more mess, try to remember that this is part of her development. She must need to learn something from this. Instead of getting upset, maybe try playing with her for a minute. When your done, say lets play clean up. It doesn't matter how little they are, they love to help and if they think it's playing to clean, their won't be any crying and throwing themselves on the floor. You both win! You get the mess cleaned up and she gets positive attention. Keep in mind, she won't be little forever. This is a stage and you will get through it.
4. Distraction is sometimes the best thing to do to avoid a fight. When your toddler is pulling on the blinds, call their name to stop him long enough to get her attention and then quickly divert her to a safe alternative. Children at this age easily forget when distracted. However it is a more difficult task once the child has been engaged in exploring the object for very long, so try to dis way them before they get to it.
5. There are many things that your child will get excited about. Baby, kitty, puppy, banana, ball, etc. These are just a few things my daughter loves. When my daughter was heading for the video cabinet to search and destroy, I would say, "Amree, where is the ball?" She would stop dead in her tracks and start looking for a ball. This was a great way to avoid discipline and a temper tantrum. Every child is different, so you must customize this plan with your own words or phrases.
6. Setting limits is a balancing act. If you are too restricted then the child doesn't learn. If you have no limits on your child then, she doesn't learn. Children are much happier when they do have some boundaries. They need them. Of course when they are first learning what they are, you will have temper tantrums. Once your child understands what they are and know that you are going to be consistent with them, life will be less stressful for both of you. It will protect them from dangers, but allow them to explore within boundaries. It is important to teach your children about limits when they are young, so they will respect having limits placed on them when they are adults. This is something that never goes away.
Some times the best way to handle setting limits on a small child is to just shut the door to the room you do not want her in or to put up a gate to block a dangerous place. At least until they are old enough to understand this particular limit.
7. It is important to monitor your tone of voice when you discipline your child. Some times it is hard not to yell or raise your voice when you are upset, but if you frequently yell at your child, then they will start to become desensitised to it. Then when your toddler is running for the road and you yell for their attention, they will not respond to you. Raising your voice should only be used in an emergency situation.
Believe it or not, when your child is screaming and getting a little crazy, talking in a calm and in control voice will help them to calm down and listen. Discipline at this moment will only escalate the situation and your child will learn nothing. It took me till my third child to figure that one out. It's amazing!
8. Having routine and structured activities can make your toddler feel happier and safer. When you have activities for your child, it gives them less time to get in to trouble, because they are already busy with something else. Boredom is a license to seek and destroy. Even older children and some adults have this problem. So having activities planned can help your learn and develop new things and keep your house a little neater at the same time. Keeping your child busy is the best defense for discipline.
Routines are great for toddlers. Toddlers don't like surprises for the most part. It makes them feel unsafe. If they know what to expect, then they are happy. If we clean up after playing with toys every time, then your little one won't mind helping with that. If we take a nap after lunch, then she will know that is what to expect. Of course, if this is not something your toddler is use to, then you may have a fight on your hands at first, but give it a week and things will be so much easier on you and her.
Even though these things are targeted for toddler, some of them can be used for older children also. Remember that it's best to start young to develop and train your children to be responsible and well adjusted adults. Yes, I say adults, because what you do now will determine who they will be as a teenager and eventually as an adult. It's hard to think about this when you have your cute little baby or your rambunctious toddler. Wow! That's a big responsibility. I Hope this helps.
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